This maybe part of a new series of pissed off rants, so brace yourselves.

Why are there so many dumb-ass sayings in the English language?  I was thinking about this, and decided “How the tables have turned” is quite fricken retahded.  I mean seriously…  every table I can ever recall sitting at was pretty damn symmetrical, therefore, if you turn the tables your likely sitting in front of the same shit you were before  but, you’re likely a little more pissed off. Secondly, why are you turning multiple tables? WTF? Someone better chill the hell out with the damn spinning tables… all I need is one table; I mean I know I’m fat, but if John Goodman only needs one… what kinda fatso needs two?! Maybe if I had one triangular table, then I may want another just to make the damn thing a rectangular like shape, maybe a rhombus… you know, the whole four corners bit… that’s a desirable table.  Finally, with this whole table… I get that shit on this table maybe reversed IF there was any shit on the table, but stop making sense of things, asshole.

Fuck every table right now.

I wonder what the Food tastes like…. Ass?
…Apparently this place is really called “The Canal”… and they need some sign work.

Ick, this woman should go to the vet to be put under… with that face she could pass as a rat, right? Jesus, I hate this chick… go to permanent sleep.

Just a few thoughts I had after watching this…

5. Shoudn’t have had so many strokes Dick Clark.
4. Seriously, this butt-hole still looks like he’s 50.
3. Is this just rude of ABC to show this old creep like this?
2. Ryan Seacrest is a dooooosh.
1. Happy New Year!

Todays fake word of the day is: Thoob – A Third Boob and Nipple

There is something about this that relaxes me… Weird… yeah… funny… yeah… but for some reason it has a calming effect… maybe it means the best is yet to come, or maybe it’s the solution to solving world hunger… or maybe, this broad is just hot, and has 3 boobs.

PS- no one cares if this is just photoshop magic, it’s still wonderful. Total Recall anyone?

I’m really not a fan of any story such as this… but you can’t get away from it… so fuggit, here’s a joke: